Finding Balance After the Breakdown: 15 Years of Unseen Struggle

There was a time in my life when I thought something was deeply wrong with me. Month after month, I would fall into emotional spirals, disconnect from loved ones, and lose control over my thoughts and reactions—only to return to “normal” days later. I began to fear myself, my emotions, and my own mind.

I wasn’t lazy. I wasn’t unstable. I wasn’t broken.

I was living with PMDD—Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder—and I didn’t even know it.

After more than a decade of confusion, exhaustion, and misdiagnosis, I finally recognized and accepted that what I was experiencing had a name, a pattern, and a neurological foundation. That acceptance marked the beginning of my healing journey.

In this post, I share how I slowly began rebuilding from the inside out. No single doctor, medication, or moment “fixed” me—but consistent steps, informed by neuroscience and self-compassion, led me to balance. These are the tools I integrated into my daily life:

✅ Maintaining a cycle calendar to track emotional and physical patterns

✅ Taking clinically supported vitamins (B6, magnesium, omega-3, calcium)

✅ Practicing yoga, daily walks, and grounding movement

✅ Establishing a sleep hygiene routine to protect my nervous system

✅ Reducing caffeine to minimize mood spikes and anxiety

✅ Keeping a personal journal to process feelings and track triggers

✅ Communicating openly with my partner about PMDD windows

✅ Participating in PMDD support groups, including the IAPMD (International Association for Premenstrual Disorders)

✅ Committing to trauma-informed therapy with a PMDD-aware focus

✅ Following an anti-inflammatory diet to reduce systemic stress

✅ Applying neuroscience-based tools like breathwork, vagus nerve toning, and mindfulness to regulate my brain-body connection

Medically, PMDD is believed to result from an abnormal brain response to normal hormonal changes—particularly involving progesterone and its neuroactive metabolite allopregnanolone, which interacts with GABA-A receptors. This interaction affects emotional regulation, stress response, and executive functioning. In PMDD brains, this response becomes dysregulated, leading to symptoms that are not just psychological—but deeply neurological and physical.

This post is more than a testimony. It’s a roadmap for healing—a message of hope for anyone who feels lost in their cycle, unheard by their doctors, or unsure of what’s happening in their body and mind.

You are not alone. And you don’t have to keep breaking down every month. Balance is possible—and it starts with understanding, acceptance, and the right tools.

"The journey to answers may be long, but every step toward understanding your body is a step toward reclaiming your power. You are not broken—you are becoming aware."